SBF: Problem Id

The things that make me unsuitable for SBF:

  • Too lazy
  • Too indecisive
  • Too unsystematic

They don't stop me from working at the SBF though. At least not yet.

And now that I've done Problem Identification, I can start working on Proposed Solutions. :p

Posted at 2:51:32 am by ferdikom98
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my life without me (a spontaneous oral review)

So like I was just finished watching "My Life Without Me" which had been playing in Metro TV, and my brother asked, "was the film good?" He had been browsing the web upstairs (from this very computer that I am now typing on).

I answered, something to the effect of, "yes, it was very good. Its about this... girl, who is living in a... disadvantageous economic situation, with two kids and a husband, and she's living in a trailer park and she is, like dying from cancer. And so she like, makes these tapes that she records, like for example for her two baby girls that she intends to give to them, or have her doctor give them to her girls, one for each birthday. She makes these tapes for everyone around her. Her family. And close friends. She doesn't tell them that she's dying and can't be cured.

"She is like, not exactly regretting that she is going to die real soon, but she's not positive and pretending to be this "superwoman" that is strong and is going to get through all this all right. Its not like she would not love to be able to live longer, to see her girls grow up, to see her Mom happy, and her husband find a better job, too. But she refuses to have the last moments of her life be a total drag, too. She doesn't want to be a burden, an excessive burden, on her family either since she can imagine the costs of her medication, the hospitalization, all those things that, as she sees it, can't possibly cure her either and would just make her family miserable.

"The film makes... the film's tone and manner is what you'd call "real life", in that all shot was taken as though hand held (and I really suspect that they actually were), so like they were always moving just ever so slightly and is tilted just so very slightly, as though the camera wobles as like in a home made video. And the dialogue, I mean they were... at least written as though they were spontaneous though they were probably written beforehand, but they really seem spontaneous and you can actually believe that these characters would speak just like that if you would encounter them in these situations in real life. It just makes the movie seem more... honestly real and alive.

"And so yeah, I guess I really liked the movie."

Although I didn't actually saw it from the beggining. For those familiar with the movie, I actually began watching it from the part when Anne was in the night club with the Hairdresser (I was actually going downstairs intending to get a glass of cold water down my throat; my sister was watching), when I saw a glimpse of the movie and sat down and didn't get off my chair until a few moments ago when I finished talking to my brother, went upstairs and started typing this blog post.

I'm gonna buy the DVD as soon as I have bought my new DVD writer.


Its a nice movie that I'm glad to watch considering the situation that I'm in, since it kinda has these neat 'lessons' about life, love, death, family n' stuffs and is just... uplifting in a non-mushy way and it....

But I'm still in the situation I'm in. (See the post below).

Posted at 10:59:04 pm by ferdikom98
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btw sbf

Btw I'm thinking of quitting the Sacred Bridge; but the backup plan I thought I had in place is not fully functional. I have informed the Authoritiesy, and I have till Monday to come up with a solution.

A rough sitrep analysis by said Authority and me grounds the underlying problem upon the Nias Culture's lack of loyalty.

Authority assumes that said lack of loyalty is inherent, though IMHO it is only a recent, modern development (this opinion I kept to myself, since I have no verifiable data to support it).

I wish I could stay without impunity; I appreciate the Bridge's idealistic dreams. I wish my backup plan would give me a clue; you offer me 200% pay to betray my loyalty, yet you leave me floating on a sea of....



(I wonder, how many people on Earth can parse this particular blog post?)

(yelling 'help!' at Englishmen in Swahili)

Posted at 11:11:20 am by ferdikom98
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I want an A-bike.

This probably has something to do with my current interest in Bike-to-Work. Though the A-Bike is probably not an ideal vehicle for Bike-to-Work, at least not in urban Jakarta

Hat tip to Stay Free! Daily. Which is closing down its treeware-operation, btw.

Posted at 9:52:04 am by ferdikom98
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Epoq - Lepidoptera

cross-posted to Lemi4 on FLOSS

For fans of the Ambient 'category' of 'electronica' (with full respect to the Ambient Community at large, for I am a self-confessed outsider/'poser' if you will)

Have you ever imagined physically soft-sounding music that can physicaly hit you through sheer tempo dynamics, as how a typical System Of A Down song can physicaly hit you through sheer volume dynamics? Check out Epoq's "Lepidoptera," an Ambient song as genuinely ambient as an outsider can judge a song to be Ambient, which hits you with an uppercut to the abdomen on your first listen with a beat so mesmerisingly... dizzying (which is the best word I can think of right now).

(Anybody out there knows at what time its actually composed? 9/16? 17/22? 22/7? Anybody? Maybe Epoq himself?) (Or it may just be that I'm too dumb musically to get the tempo (sigh))

Discovery courtesy of the Kahvi Collective, through the Vorbis.com music samples archive.

Fair Warning: this song is encoded in Ogg Vorbis, visit Vorbis.com for details on how to enable Ogg playback on your computer, wether Windows, OS X, or UNIX/Linux based.

In a nutshell (a very crushed and disfigured nutshell, I might add), if you use Windows, to listen to .Ogg audio files you install the 800kb Ogg Codecs for Windows, courtesy of Illiminable.

Or, you can just use Winamp :o)

Posted at 1:54:04 am by ferdikom98
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In Search of the Indonesian Writer('s Identity)

Roliflex aka. Tenyom aka. Avie ponders the future of Indonesian literature now that the great Pramoedya Ananta Toer has passed, and fears that the baton will not be passed to a female. Unless some things change first....

While the rest of the nation is disoriented, the great Indonesian writer must push further against the dark. Like Pram who knew exactly what his Indonesia was (whether real or imaginary), she has to re-invent Indonesia in herself. What is Indonesia, after all, if not fiction?

That a darkness must be pushed against I wholeheartedly agree.

We at the Sacred Bridge Foundation have always thought that culturally speaking, Indonesia's biggest problem as a culture is one of identity. Personally speaking, despite Indonesia being an entity forced into being by the forces of historical necessity, it does not mean that we cannot look deep within ourselves (both as an individual and as a complete Indonesian community) to solidly define who we are as a people.

Avie's essay is a most highly recommended read, at least if you have even a merely slight interest in contemporary Indonesian literature.

In Search of the Indonesian Writer by Tenyom

Posted at 9:40:50 pm by ferdikom98
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the sacred bridge message

I want to use the Internet to spread the Sacred Bridge message.


What is the Sacred Bridge message? So far what I've learned is that Indonesia has and identity of its own, and that we've got to do something to enrich this identity; that we as a culture cannot afford to keep borrowing from other nations and keep wondering off in a hundred different directions never really going anywhere. I'm sure its deeper than this, and I am determined to learn. I can't begin to spread the message until I understand the message itself.

I've got to actually become a part of Sacred Bridge. Know everyone involved with Sacred Bridge, both in the office and those "bounded solely by moral obligation" (ie. our team of experts).

As for spreading the message, I was kinda thinking of getting the blogging world talking about Sacred Bridge. But building actuall real-life human relations is more important. Both should be inter-relating.


And that's what I've got so far.

(and I'm posting this as is knowing full well this essay could be better since I'm not gonna make this essay any better in the little Internet time I have and its more important to get these thoughts to germinate somewhere first than to make them coherent, since coherency comes with time)

Posted at 8:11:55 am by ferdikom98
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Indonesia demands new vaccine rules

Found this morning via RSS from the Associated Press:

Indonesia demands new vaccine rules
Jakarta, Indonesia -- Indonesia will not share bird flu samples with the World Health Organization until the U.N. body agrees to stop providing the strains to commercial vaccine makers without its permission, the health minister said Thursday.

Posted at 6:51:58 am by ferdikom98
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Work for life, not work for a living

I've bought a new mouse today for Rp 89.000,00, named the Eurocell mouse. It claimed to be "made in Germany". It looks well-built anyway: infra-red optical, 800 dpi at 3000 frames/second (or so says the packaging), USB plug-end with a USB-to-PS/2 adapter, nice and big unlike the el-cheapo 50-grand-a-hit ultra-mini-mouse that seem to be "all the rage" lately (which I can't seem to bring myself to like since they're just too small for my hands); but I can't seem to find any web references to it.

It puts an email address, panacell *at* panacellular dot-com, so naturally I tried www.panacell.com. The page currently says under maintenance, but it redirects to http://webindo.net/suspended.page/, which implies that the domain owner. A quick googling points to this electronics and electrical web directory page indicates that the domain name www.panacell.com is owned by one "Wengky Widjaja" of "Panacellular" located at DKI Jakarta, Indonesia.

I'm not doubting Panacellular's claim that its made in Germany (the mouse looks and operates good enough for the claim to be true, very smoothly in fact), its just a pity that a local manufacturer would have to resort to claiming its product to be made in Germany for it to sell in the local market. I personally would buy a locally made mouse made as well made and economically priced as this baby, but I guess I see where Panacell is coming from when they reason that most Indonesians would shun the mouse if it says "made in Indonesia." I wish it was, though. Made in Indonesia, that is.


I made the following reply to a post by Hugh Macleod about the latest stages of his Stormhoek wine global microbranding campaign, the "big love" documentary

You know, that last comment by Robert actually made me even more interested in Stormhoek.com. Or at least the Stormhoek story.

Revenues help fund AIDS research? Hmm, interesting...

Eh. Oh wait. You meant South African Export Revenues help fund AIDS research. Sorry, my bad. But still food for thought, tho...

Personally as a citizen of the world I can't wait for Mark Shuttleworth's Ubuntu Gang to fix bug No.1, so that we here in Indonesia can comfortably use guilt-free software (aka. Free in both Price and Freedom) in day-to-day business productivity without being looked upon by the general business communities as idealist wackos so like, go SA :)

I'm posting it here just in case the above link-heavy comment doesn't pass Mr. Macleod's spam filters.


Its funny how I manage to cook up this much text in an instant, yet I can't seem to will myself into conjuring up a coherent document to bring to present regarding the Sacred Bridge Foundation's website (still under construction; not suspended indefinitely (I hope)). I'm supposed to be the new Communications Head, but I can't "communicate" effectively (at least when I define "communicate" as "talking about and promoting SBF so that people start talking about SBF in public") when I'm too busy trying to create project timetables and program rundowns (or helping my fellow Program Head to make them).

(all opinions herewith are personal in nature and does not necessarily represent the SBF etc., etc.,...)

But to be honest I definitely hope to stay a long time with the SBF. They (as far as I can tell) actually have a mission that I can intellectually and morally respect (to promote the Cultural Healing, sorry I meant Nourishing of Indonesia), as opposed to the survival motivated yet morally suspect ideal of my previous workplaces (eg. Advertising's mission to create aggregate demand ad infinitum). One central tenet of the SBF is that if one can lead oneself then one can lead others, which is specifically defined in our own little universe as true in reverse too eg. you cannot lead others until you learn to lead yourself.

Meaning, that if I can't even create a decent project timetable then I have no business communicating about the SBF's projects.

But that's life, you know. I mean work. You can prepare yourself through more than 20 years of education yet not be prepared for what lays in your path. Some people say that this can only happen in Indonesia, but I challenge anyone to prove that it doesn't happen worldwide. But that's not the point. The point is Work is not Life. If you work for a living (or even worse don't have any other life aside from work) as opposed to working for life (to make the world a better place, or at least to make your own life happier).


Which brings me to what I had originally set out to talk about in this blog: today's Sunday sermon, which basically says something to the effect of "work for life, but don't work so much that it becomes your life." Among other things. Or something to that effect.

I'll let you know when I remember.

Posted at 12:05:17 am by ferdikom98
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Jakarta Flood, February 2005

Well apparently it is a five-year cycle, this big flood of Jakarta. I live in the West Jakarta area, and water just hit the first floor of my house. Its about a centimeter high down there. Its still drizzling. Everyone's still dry though, here in the second floor.

I'm tired but I can't quite sleep, afraid that the water may rise higher. Five years ago the water was about five centimeters high (more or less 2 inches). I don't want it to rise higher this year, but that is not up to me.

The 'Net is a bit skittish tonight, but at least I've still got a connection. People are still stuck within the heart of Jakarta. I'll update with photographs tomorrow, when everyone's awake and I can ask my sister where she kept the camera's USB cable. Hope this posts...

Posted at 2:33:38 am by ferdikom98
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Next Page

I don't write intellectually. I write expressively. I don't claim to be accurate, fair or thorough. I don't wanna get stuck on certain topics. Though I sometimes do. But not that often. I'd like to expand. I wanna write more poems. But I'll only upload them if they're good. I only rant about my life's hardships if it will rescue just a little bit of my sanity. I'm saner than I make myself out to be, though.

If I am an OS kernel, and I just had a kernel dump, I'd imagine that the text in this blog is what it would more or less look like.

There. Do you get it?


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