Entry: remembering Columbine 12/24/2004

There is a certain something that I felt my audience should be able to at least infer by reading the texts in my blog; that I don't conform too well to my social surroundings and systems, that I feel my education system cheats me, that there should be more important things in life other than grades, degrees, and pieces of paper called 'diplomas.'

On a recent trip to Kuro5hin's culture section, I discovered a little piece about an alternative teaching method called Programmed Instructions. The main focus of the article is about an alternative to public schooling.

At the end of the article, it referenced a series of /. articles entitled "Voices from the Hellmouth" and an online book entitled "The Underground History of American Education". Both are only available as either online web sites or as a printed book buyable (obscurely) from Amazon. No PDFs or CC-licensed downloadable copies, unfortunately.

If any of these writings can convince anyone that my learning problems are real; if any of these writings can convince someone to put real effort into changing the system; if even just one person can be rescued from the illusion that it is him/herself that's at fault instead of the system....

All I ask is please, don't tell me I'm not trying hard enough without at least trying to understand me first. The social pressures to conform pushed two human beings, having been pushed beforehand into insanity, into killing thirteen and wounding hundreds. Not videogames. I feel for them all, victims and gunmen, though I'd never do something like it; I just don't have the guts.

I'd been gutted already.


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